What we need is a giant bath plug…
….to shut James Cameron’s mouth up once and for all.
So the oil spill in the Gulf of Mexico has been in the news for a while now. The only reason I looked it up further today was because apparently Obama likened it to 9/11….ha de ha hah.
ANYWAY, it seems with any major world occurence these days, the scientists call in JAMES fucking CAMERON for his wise wisdom, because it seems BP/Halliburton/whoever the hell’s responsible seem to fail at finding a solution to stopping the flow of crude oil into the ocean.
I MEAN SERIOUSLY!??!?!??! :
Federal officials are hoping film director James Cameron can help them come up with ideas on how to stop the disastrous oil spill in the Gulf of Mexico.
…The Avatar and Titanic director was among a group of scientists and other experts who met on Tuesday with officials from the Environmental Protection Agency and other federal agencies for a brainstorming session on stopping the massive oil leak. [WTF!??!?!?!? W.T.F.!?!??!]
The Canadian-born Cameron is considered an expert on underwater filming and remote vehicle technologies. Avatar and Titanic are the two highest-grossing films of all time.
I just love how the article adds in the quote “Avatar and Titanic are the two highest-grossing films of all time.” right after “The Canadian-born Cameron is considered an expert on underwater filming and remote vehicle technologies.” like his movies JUSTIFY ANY REASON WHY he is invited to all these scientific conventions and meetings and whatnot IN THE FIRST PLACE.
Honest to god……….can you imagine how productive their meeting would have went?
Scientist: So…we have a serious problem on our hands. Oil is leaking out of the well at an alarming rate and if we don’t do something about it soon, the entire Gulf of Mexico will be a war zone!
Scientist 2: Well Obama compared it to 9/11 so it must be pretty bad! Whatever shall we do!??!
James Cameron: It’s ok guys, I have high tech 3D cameras I used in the production of Avatar; with my connections I’ll get a whole rig and set em up over here and film the work in progress in 3D. I’m sure we could all make a massive 3D movie out of it and it could even possibly recoup all of BP’s losses from this debacle because people are dumb and buy into all this shit!!!Oh, and I shot Titanic in 1997 with my technological expertise, so…you know. I’m also a massive expert at shooting underwater, coz Titanic was just so revolutionary and ground breaking and all. Most people don’t know how to use camera angles when filming underwater but with my scientific background I can capture the black plumes of crude oil spilling out of the well in high definition 3D with the best possible composition and lighting for the extreme shock factor. The whole world will love us for it!
Scientists in unison: OH MAH GAWD JAMES CAMERON YOU’RE MY IDOL CAN YOU SIGN MY MICROSCOPE PLZ!?!!!1!?!1!!??!/!!!?/11111??
James Cameron: Now now children, I’ve already got my team underway into the project. Forget science, we need some marketing, some public relations, some production assistants and some caterers. The Gulf of Mexico Oil Spill: The Movie, coming to theaters in 2011!
ugh. If anything, the scientists probably don’t even know what to do anymore so they were all probably just like “fuck this, let’s just call in James Cameron and maybe we can find out secret deets about the upcoming Avatar sequel while pretending to figure out a solution to this mess. Sounds like FUN!!!”
Next thing you know, they’ll be bringing in the cast from the recently cancelled Law & Order to give their own insight into how the US should go about dealing with the legal implications too. Seeing as they’re all free and have nothing better to do, they were on a hit tv show – therefore are way more qualified than actual lawyers to give their opinion on the matter!!
I…really….don’t…understand…..why….or….how….
I mean first it was the Mars Rover…now its the Oil Spill!?!?! What a multitalented guy. Maybe he can find a solution to the war in Iraq while he’s at it. Oh and at the same time, he can also use his expert video technological experience and knowledge to seek and destroy Osama Bin Laden. Considering they both have a love for crappy movies I’m sure this will be an epic showdown.
Jakki posted @ 5:44 pm
Now this is how you weed them out
So…job hunting kind of sucks. But I thought this was pretty funny, considering this is a professional GOVERNMENT JOB for a FACILITY OFFICER position:
Picture says it all, really. Next thing you know, they’ll have onsite web applications that scan your computer to see if you’re using Windows 95 before proceeding.
Jakki posted @ 7:47 pm
Darth Vader…light sabers…Chewbacca…that’s all you need to know.
It has only been within the past week or so that my faith in Star Wars has diminished.
Way back before I rewatched these abominations, I remembered the Star Wars prequels to be full of awesome adventure and action and cool light sabers and amazing backdrops……man was I WRONG. I rewatched all 3 and I gotta say…what was I thinking??! Maybe it was because I was really young when I watched them, and they were incredibly hyped up when they were released, and I really liked Natalie Portman’s pretty outfits…but oh. my. god. What horrible films!!! They really don’t do the originals any justice at all!!
I can’t believe I actually sat through it all because the acting was TERRIBLE (who the hell actually bought Hayden Christensen’s turning to the dark side – honestly), the dialogue was atrocious and the plots…well…I don’t know if you could even call them plots. I mean, at least the originals had better flow and portrayal of a far reaching galaxy with likeable characters….it made it exciting and interesting and fun to watch. But the prequels just sucked the LIFE out of the whole star wars world. Even Yoda was way more bad ass and had way better dialogue in the originals than he did in the prequels!!!
I think the main reason why it sucked so much was because George Lucas spent all 3 films just overloading CGI and pointless scenes, and then everything about Darth Vader and his story with Padme is reduced to 5 minutes of explaining just why he wears his mask, how Padme dies and how Leia and Luke got separated.
It’s just….STUPID. I don’t even know where to start with how bad the prequels really are!!! I frankly can’t believe how I actually thought the prequels were watchable……………………..it’s just…unbelievable. I don’t think even words can describe just how bad it is. You have to see for yourself:
(fast forward to the 3:00 mark…or you can watch Hayden Christensen’s crappy acting in full while he makes a mockery of Darth Vader’s iconage)
And if you want to watch some more bad acting, here are my personal faves:
Obi Wan and Padme cry over the younglings
Padme and Annie’s unstable relationship
And if you really want to view more horrible Star Wars clips, click here.
I think the cheesy, badly acted romance just seals the fact that these prequels were useless garbage and are only enjoyable to the people under the age of 13.
What horrible, horrible films. Hard to believe these films managed to earn millions at the box office, smash ticket sales records AND made Hayden Christensen a z-grade star. Seriously.
Jakki posted @ 11:38 pm
The belt loops that started it all…
So here it is: the reason why this blog exists in the first place.
It all started with my pair of black jeans.
It is the kind of jeans that has useless, tight zip pockets – making it impossible to put a hand in there without scraping painfully against the zipper. Which is the reason why I never use the pockets…ever.
I noticed the weird belt loops on these jeans a while ago now, and it was just so WTF…so pointless…I felt I had to share my utter confusion with the rest of the world. And so, the shit blog was born.
The pictures speak for themselves!
Seriously, why sew belt loops OVER a pocket which is meant to be zipped/unzipped?!?!? FYI the other side only has one belt loop so unless I want to wear a belt like an idiot with it hanging down to one side…I will never know why they made it like this.
All I know is, my jean pockets are useless. 
In other news, I updated the Cam is Disgusted page with bulk new photos. Check them out, they are all very funny! 
Wind...WTF?
My internet is going very slow right now, and it has taken me SO LONG to upload these photos so APPRECIATE!! And just to show you HOW slow my internet is going…I am currently uploading a video and it is at:
4.58 MB of 8.34 MB (1.84 KB/sec) — 34 minutes remaining
Yeah, its basically like dial up speed.
I have no idea why though, because the main PC can upload a 100MB~ video in less than half an hour, and internet speed has been an ongoing issue for me …… so it is definitely something wrong with my macbook. SIGH.
I really want to go to bed too, but because of my upload, I now have to stay up an extra half an hour. 
….
I may just have to sleep on my desk because sitting down and using the internet is THIS TIRING.
Jakki posted @ 1:14 am
Lost Mega Post
Okay, so I’ve thought about it….probably going to rewatch it tonight….but I need to rant about this.
The Lost finale.
The episode of all episodes.
The End.
(Just a warning, this post will contain a bazillion spoilers!!! And probably also 90% incoherent ranting)
I WAS SO READY TO CRY BUCKETS when this series ended. But not only did I sit there staring at the screen for a few minutes with a look of despair and frustration all at the same time, I was shocked. Shocked at how for 6 seasons, there had been a sense of mystery, a sense that not all was as it seemed, a sense of intrigue, a sense that there was something deeper behind why and how they all got on this random island in the first place….and then it was all shot to hell in ten minutes with the purgatory/nirvana BS.
No idea what I’m talking about? Well…you’d probably need to have seen all the episodes to fully understand just how much of a letdown this finale was. In fact, the whole of season 6 was a bit of a letdown, but I’ll get into that later on.
If you want a summary of season 1-5, you can watch this clip which sums it all up pretty well (although it is pretty confusing…probably even more so to people who don’t watch the show regularly):
Basically, in the final episode, it is explained that the alternate timeline introduced in season 6 was actually a ‘purgatory’ in which everyone was dead, and looking for each other so they could ‘move on’ to the next plane/dimension/heaven/whatever you want to call it. Everything that happened on the island until Jack died was REAL, but they all died at different points in time during the series and the alternate reality was a way for everyone to meet each other and be together. Once they had found each other and remembered their time on the island in the sideways reality, they congregated at a church where Jack was the last one to realize they were all dead. And then with Jack’s father leading the way, all the cast members are engulfed and beamed up in white light.
Final ten minutes of Lost:
I have to say, the end scene WAS beautiful and I really liked how the writers brought everything full circle with the same opening and closing shots of Jack just lying there in the jungle. I really liked the Sun/Jin and Sawyer/Juliet scenes, but honestly……the entire episode was also very corny. I remember just sitting there watching during the middle and thinking ‘man….this feels like Im watching the epilogue of Harry Potter‘. And at times it felt very forced too, especially the Jack/Kate scenes. Ughhhhhh. Talk about deus ex machina overload.
As a whole, the ending just wasn’t very satisfying. Perhaps on an emotional level, we get to see the characters have a bittersweet ending in that they DO find each other, even though they are all DEAD, and they all go to heaven…but COME ON. It’s all well and good to portray how important friendship, love and togetherness is, but on an intellectual level…it was horse shit. It was seriously a really bad M. Night Shyamalan ending. One of those really disappointing types of endings where you find out it was all a dream at the very end.
I knew from the start the writers would never be able to answer EVERYTHING, and yes, some things are better left to the imagination. But there are just so many unanswered questions, so many things that don’t make sense, so many things that are now pointless….I think the biggest problem I had with the ending was that it made Season 1-5 seem like a huge joke. Like everything that happened before the alternate timeline was just irrelevant.
One of the things that made Lost such an epic TV show was that it was a constant cliffhanger, a constant mystery, and that there was constant speculation on the various red herrings/clues in relation to the characters and what was happening on the island. I really admire the writers and their ability to just weave the storylines like they had planned it all from the start, and their use of various pop culture references like Watchmen and Star Wars. The writing definitely set the show out from everything else, and I still think it is one of the best written tv shows to ever have been made.
Which is why I thought the ending was so disappointing. The build up was ok…but the ending. Overall, it just seemed like the writers had completely kicked the most important questions to the curb. Ones like:
- What is the Island? Why could the Dharma Initiative get there in 1977 but no one came to rescue the survivors? How does the island time travel?
- What IS the smoke monster and why/how does it project images of dead people?
- What happens when Smokey leaves the island?
- What was the deal with Claire? Why did she just suddenly disappear in the jungle and leave Aaron?
- What did Kate’s horse dreams mean?
- Why can women not give birth on the island?
- Why does the island seemingly cure people of their illnesses?
- Why did Jack give the guardianship of the island to Hurley and not Ben!?!?!?!?
- How did Jacon make up his list of candidates and how did he build the lighthouse?
- What was the significance of the hieroglyphs/tawaret statue?
- Why were the numbers such a big part of the show??
- What was the deal with the temple? Sayid rising from the dead? Yeah..
- Why did MIB turn into a smoke monster when he went down the cave of light but not Desmond or Jack?
It’s just FRUSTRATING and I know you could argue that the writers have left all these ‘up to the imagination’, but it just feels so cheap. Like everything that happened in season 1-5 meant nothing. And the temple in season 6 didn’t even impact on the main crux of the story AT ALL. Sayid’s rising from the dead and becoming all weird? Claire’s crazy talk??? WTF!?!?
WHY.
WHY THROW IN SO MUCH IRRELEVANT SCENES AND SECRET CLUES AND UNANSWERED QUESTIONS WHEN YOU CAN’T ANSWER THEM.
As soon as I saw Jack’s father at the end I was just like ‘Whaaaat the heeeelll….what is this?!’ And the whole religious symbolism – season 6 was FILLED with christian metaphors to the bible. And finding out at the end the alternate timeline was a ‘purgatory’, that Michael was still atoning for his sins and everyone else that didn’t matter were busy sorting their own lives out….it just kind of discounts all the mystery with the whole destiny/chance thing which was constantly brought up within the series. Don’t know if it was just me but Jack getting stabbed in the side and being the ‘chosen one’ to kill fake Locke totally reminded me of the resurrection. Or maybe I’m just looking into it too much.
The fact remains……the finale was cheap and it was very unsatisfying. It wasn’t badly made by any means – I mean the stunts were awesome and Jack flykicking Locke on the cliffface was pretty cool.
It’s just…the writing was crap. And I think the writers knew it because they were defending it even before the finale came out saying ‘oh its always been about the characters and what happens to them blah blah blah’.
What was even worse than the Lost finale….the Jimmy Kimmel Lost special after the show aired. Seriously lame jokes and lame cast questions.
I really need to find a new tv show to watch now that Lost is over!
I will end this post with the Answers song – because it is awesome and it further proves how much of a sucky ending Lost had.
Oh and this Lost rap video…just coz….;D